Why I NEED a GPS for my birthday.

I get lost everywhere I go. If I have not driven there before by myself, I will, inevitably, get lost. For example, last week, I went over to my family members' house. On the way home, I took the interstate going the wrong direction. I thought, for some reason, that South was the way I was supposed to go but, I realized as the "Int'l Boarder" signs increased in frequency and lessened in milage posts, I was going the wrong direction. Tonight, coming home from the same family members' house, I knew not to take that highway, but I had forgotten to check the best way to get home. So, I headed in the direction I knew the freeway was and just thought I would go a bit further to find the Northbound freeway. I, instead, approached a "Do Not Enter" sign posted on the road that would take me any further. My options were to take a left turn into the scary residential area that I had no clue about or take the same Southbound freeway I took last time. I took the Southbound freeway deciding I would just turn around at the next exit. The next exit was another freeway, going in the wrong direction (at least I recognized it this time, though and did not take it). The following exit approached and I was going to take it when I saw another freeway, going in the right direction! I took that and ended up on my way home. This would not be such a big deal had I not spent an hour yesterday trying to find a street to get me out of a very traffic filled town, an extra 20 min a week ago taking what was apparently (my boyfriend informed me) "the loooooong way home," or a panic filled 15 min last Christmas season in a scary part of town trying to take my little cousins for ice cream and a merry-go-round ride. At least I still have Iowa license plates and people just see me as the annoying tourist and not the incompetent local.

Evening As A Waitress

Last night, a table asked me about my heritage. After telling them my main ingredients, one of the men said, "So, you are not Yugoslavian?"

"No," I replied, "Not that I am aware of."

"Are you sure?"

"Pretty sure."

"Oh, because you look very Yugoslavian. We all were convinced that you were."

"Are you sure? Because I think I probably look very confused."

Also, another table later in the night asked me about where I came from and I told them my story of beginning in California (starting off not so great with the comment, "I was born here when I was younger.") and growing up in Iowa. One of the women was so excited that I was from Iowa, she told me, "That's awesome! I always heard that Iowa was one of those mythical states that you hear exists but you never actually meet anyone that has been to Iowa much less is from Iowa." I told her, "Yes, it exists, believe me. I have tried to wish it away many times, but alas, it lives on. Maybe the people that go to visit it just get lost in the corn fields and never come out."